Alternative takes on Obama-Crowley-Gates party

1. “The Sheriff at the Gates: A Farce in Three Acts’’

Act One

(A street in Cambridgeham. Most Exalted University Professor HENRY LOUIS GATES, freshly returned from the Land of the Asian Khan, is rattling the door of his keep. Enter a WENCH.)...

From The Boston Globe

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2. A Beer with Obama

The Oval Office. Late. President Obama sits across from Professor Henry Louis Gates, Jr., and Officer James Crowley, who share a couch. They sit amidst several empty beer bottles. No one’s wearing shoes...


Posted by John Kenney in The New Yorker

The Mikado

Some great Gilbert humor from The Mikado by G&S:

(of the Mikado's son and his fleeing from his unattractive wife-to-be, Katisha)

Pooh-Bah: I'm surprised that he should have fled from one so lovely.

Katisha: That is not true. You hold that I'm not beautiful because my face is plain. But you know nothing. You are still unenlightened. Learn, then, that it is not in the face alone that Beauty should be sought.
My face is unattractive.
But I have a left shoulder blade that is a miracle of loveliness. People come miles to see it.

My right elbow has a fascination that few can resist.

Pooh-Bah: Allow me.

Katisha: It is on view Tuesdays and Fridays on presentation of visiting card.

As for my circulation, it is the largest in the world.

Ko-Ko: And yet he fled.

The Mikado: And he is masquarading in this town disguised as a second trombone.

21st Century America(ns)

How to Define Yourself in a World of Definitions

1. Research
"I have a mind!" should be the first words out of your mouth. Second should be, "And how shall I use it?" with a healthy, dramatic pause for the audience, who mercifully gasp holes in the air. Go out there. Observe. Choose role-models. Throw them away. Choose others. Place yourself in unorthodox situations and work your way through with that courage you've been waiting to use. Throw some of that youthful instinct on the burner, toss some broccoli or orange slices in there with a pinch of enthusiasm, and take a whiff. What's it smell like? Terror? panic? death...? Not a chance. There should be a spiral of smoke circling from your concoction thats tinged with a fresh sprig of parsley-scented opportunity. Now take it and...

2. Bend the Rules
"Don't ask for permission, ask for forgiveness" as the saying goes. I prefer "demand adherence." if the irony is not immediately apparent, let me just add that i'm one of the most lily-livered idea-men out there; if only i could drop the social obligation and take a page out of the objectivist handbook I would be allll right. Innovation is the name of the game and if you don't have dreams of Greatness then hand the reins over to your non-existent ego, sit back in your carriage pulled by two surging steads named Nescience and Oblivion, and enjoy the ride.

3. Persona
"Weakness of attitude becomes weakness of character" and character breaths life into the fabric of our modern reality. True character can be found in the work of Brauer or Frobenius, but our character comes from negation and a healthy suspicion of society. Re-creation, in the literal meaning of the word, and rediscovery, as psychoanalysts breath it, both lie beneath the warm, comforting covering of the self. The uncovering happens in step 1, harvesting comes in step 2, and profits flow here, when your exuberantly unique personality is established and nationally recognized. Craft every thought with a pre-thought and dominate yourself with deliberate ease. This is the Schillerian moment when the two impulses flow as one from without and within, ebbing and flowing with balance, ever intertwined, complementing each other. Cash it in: sell your self on the stock exchange and watch your stock grow.

4. The Part
Play the Part. Your Persona that you created in the previous steps steps into this all-star role with confidence and poise. Sharpened by experience, enlightened by Truth, protected by dignity and ego, experienced by protection, truthed by sharpen-ment, ego-ed by enlightenment, dignity protected by ego, truth sharpened to enlightenment through experience, and ..... and loved by all.

Tricky Linguistics

A great example of the absurdly hilarious comedic style that Fry & Laurie excel at.

"Hold the news-reader's nose squarely, waiter, or friendly milk will countermand my trousers".... a unique child delivered to a unique mother

Gelliant Gutfright

Between imagination and desire, between reality and ambition, between what is known and what is feared, between purpose and despair, between sense and shite, between the outer world and the inner world, that straddles the curtain between what we know and what we think we suspect, hangs a dark veil that waves gently between the beckoning finger drawing us into the world of what could be and what never couldn't be possible to have dreamt; or do they? Perhaps it isn't. Maybe we were only dreaming. Perhaps the answers could be found in that other realm, that lies between the boundary of the heart and the sweaty laundry room of the imagination, where the only rhythms are the smiles of the forgotten winter and the incessant beating of the human thigh that we call fear...

"When your knight is a perilous yo-yo eaten by Destiny's right hand." Stephen Fry's narration is fantastic.

Googly Eyes Gardener

I try not to post videos of no consequence, but I found this one hilarious:

http://www.hulu.com/watch/16417/saturday-night-live-googly-eyes-gardener#s-p1-st-i0